We women can be so full of ourselves A LOT of the times *insert rolling eyes emotion* As in… we get so wrapped up in things we are going through… or things we do or do not want (more money, heartbreak). Let’s not forget how we feel about ALMOST EVERYTHING on earth… if it’s not our once-a-month friend who’s always wearing that annoying red blazer, it’s the latest makeup brand, that obvious pimple, our cracked phone screen, expensive aso-ebi, chipped nails, colour blocking, Kim Kardashian and her nude episodes *tueh*… and so on and so forth.
Point in brief is, we forget that the guys also go through stuff. We have made them into this stone-walls that do not feel, yet the naked truth is, they experience just about everything we do, depression, jealousy, emotional, financial and societal pressure (to get married), you just name it! Their mode of expression is generally different, but these things are certainly in there somewhere, don’t be fooled.
Let’s get to the meat of the gist…
I recently admitted that (perhaps) guys also get desperate about marriage. Yup! Ladies aren’t the only ones feeling the heat. I have been interacting alot more with guys in their 30 somethings… seeing as my own 30 is waving from a little distance (Side Note: Can’t believe I just said that. Can someone please make me 12 again? LOL)… Moving on, I realised, guys are also very concerned about the the women they want to be/end up with. These guys are also looking out for special qualitiesin the women they are interacting with but I’ve met some who aren’t up-ing their games in the ‘hunt’ for a life-mate. They want to catch exciting babes, but, the big question is, are they making themselves exciting enough?
So, I started wondering, what would I want my guy (wherever he is) to be doing at this time (especially if he’s also, hopefully, single and ready to boggie down).
Here’s what I’ve come up with.
* ELIMINATE YOUR CONFUSION / DON’T DO BUFFET.
You see, there are TOO MANY CONFUSED GOOD GUYS out there. They want a serious relationship with the kind of girl papa and mama will like and accept as daughter-in-law to be, but they are yet to overcome that ‘buffet’ spirit controlling them. They like Shalewa, want Chichi, are toasting Amina but busy leading Valerie on, enjoying a faux relationship with Nosa and yet consider Nse the ultimate wife material! Only yoooooou? Shooooooo…. Ok, so maybe it’s not this bad for every guy but you get what I mean, right? Guys, please-biko-ejo, get your es-esh-ee-tea together and stop confusing innocent ladies with your own confusion. Decide who or what you want and stick to that! If for any reason, there’s no future with that one, cut ties and move on. Don’t try to eat your noodles and have it. Awoof dey run belle. A girl will be ready to settle with you if she sees that you are equally focused.
* KNOW THE COOLEST PLACES IN TOWN
This is that place you get to score a lot of marks. One way you get get a girl interested in your market is by being up to date on the coolest spots to hang out in town. Do you homework buddy! Don’t take her to the cinemas, or any of those obvious places, she’s most likely tired of visiting. Make her believe dating you will be an adventure of a lifetime by ensuring you make a bad-ass first impression. If you score good points the first time, you are most likely to get a second date. Note: Be sure you avoid places where things she doesn’t like go on. E.g Don’t take me somewhere people smoke, date is automatically ruined with alarming effect!
* KNOW A BIT ABOUT EVERYTHING
There’s no girl on Earth that can resist an intelligent guy. Make yourself one by broadening your horizon. Know about different things, from science, to business, government, books, movies. Read fun facts, foreign news, maps, gossip blogs, payment receipts and marykay manual (I’m kidding). When you know a little about everything, you will be able to make interesting conversation about anything and everything.
Having ice cream and pizza on a first date is OK, doesn’t have to be expensive to be a date but then again, anything can happen. What if we find ourselves at Ocean Basket? Point is, don’t be a stingy person. If you find a lady good enough to spend precious time with, be willing to invest in making those moments memorable. Who knows, she may go dutch but your options are limited if you don’t want to spend. So work hard, save well (for the date and for the marriage) and spend well (but wisely). All girls are impressed by guys who spend!
Bros… if you need me to tell you how to go about this one, there is serious problem! So help you God! Anyway… pray you aren’t wasting time with the wrong person. Pray that the person you are spending time with can add value to your life, whether you end up dating/married or not (no great guy should end up with the wrong woman). Pray your search is successful and is concluded with ease, in the shortest possible time. God is still the best match-maker in town.
Did I leave anything out? Drop in the comments section. XoXo.
Culled from kemifilani.com